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Post by HailStorm on May 11, 2006 17:31:01 GMT -5
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Post by omgiitsheathe on May 11, 2006 20:27:09 GMT -5
I laughed, I giggled, I chuckled... I did everything thats even remotely similar to those three. I never even thought of writing a fic such as that. Clever. And it shows how fooseball truly does bring enemies together  . Yay for fooseball! |
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Post by Gouki on May 12, 2006 1:45:52 GMT -5
Squee! I squee right now with joy for this fic. It's funny, well-written and gives a humourus (if a bit brief) view of something no one has realy done before; pre-Blake Holsey.
Question though, how old are they here? Is it year 7 (11 or 12) or year 9 (13 or 14)? Becuase I'm always confused about American schools and at which point one goes into High School, and leaves Middle School and all that. I figure you'd have a better grasp for some reason, seeing as you wrote the fic.
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Post by omgiitsheathe on May 12, 2006 1:56:01 GMT -5
9th grade starts highschool... so about 13, 14, 15 Im assuming.
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Post by HailStorm on May 12, 2006 5:15:12 GMT -5
I wrote them about 11/12ish based on Corrine's statement in Wormhole that went along the lines of "I've been here for 2 years, you can't just take over my room" - as Josie said she was 14 in that episode, I considered Corrine to be 14, perhaps 15, in which case she'd been there since she was 12, give or take. I know schools in the US usually are differen and high school is from like 15, but I'm going on what's said in the show and the fact that BHH is a 'prepratory academy' rather than a regular public highschool. Anyhoo, glad you both liked the fic |
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IvyCeltress
Full Member
The Principal difference between heaven and hell is the company you keep there.
Posts: 225
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Post by IvyCeltress on May 12, 2006 9:17:09 GMT -5
I loved it. Lucas's Dad especially rocked. One thing I've always enjoyed in your writing is that you capture their personalities so easily. I see the young Lucas and Marshall when I read this.
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Post by xmirrorxreflctionx on May 12, 2006 10:21:57 GMT -5
Excellent! I loved it! You truly stuck to the characters' true personalities. I laughed when Lucas was trying to decide who, exactly, Marshall was spying on him for. Sounds so much like Lucas! Quite adorable and I could see little Lucas stick his tongue out at Marshall from the safety of his car.
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Post by {88Keys} on May 12, 2006 20:44:45 GMT -5
High school usually starts around 14-15. However, I think Jim said once that he invisioned Blake Holsey as starting in like 7th or 8th grade, which would work with Hail's timeline.
Funny and clever, as always. I do see two 12 year-old boys when I read this. You managed to mix that maturity level and the elements of the characters we already know perfectly. Only one tiny nitpick- American's don't say "pulling faces." It's "making faces." Like this 
Oh, and I'm still waiting for your review of "Equations." No rush; I know you're busy. I just thought I'd mention it in case you forgot. I'm not desperate for feedback or anything. REALLY I'M NOT...
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Post by BritishHomeStores on May 13, 2006 7:26:56 GMT -5
I loved it. It's very funny and, as all your fics, well-written. I also like the idea of describing their first day in Blake Holsey.
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Post by Menack on May 14, 2006 19:00:33 GMT -5
Nicely done, as always. As all the others said, the characters are all very well drawn, and you really believe those two are, indeed, Lucas and Marshall. Good!
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Post by HailStorm on May 17, 2006 14:57:40 GMT -5
Glad you like it, guys My ego is nicely inflated now. You know how much I value characterisation so o be told I'm good at it makes me all joyous and happy ^^ 88keys: making faces, eh? I think as that's one timy thing, I may go an ammend it. I try not to make my fics sound to British (you know, putting mum instead of mom, biscuit instead of cookie) but sometimes there are things I don't know about. So thanks for correcting me! |
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Post by {88Keys} on May 21, 2006 20:31:03 GMT -5
No problem; I'm glad you didn't take it personally or anything. It's cool that you care about details like that. I don't really expect fanfic writers to do a ton of research on how to sound American or Canadian, but it does take me out of a story when the writer keeps saying things like "fancy" or "Mum" or "trousers."
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Post by HailStorm on May 22, 2006 6:30:37 GMT -5
I know what you mean - the obvious ones jar even for me. And reading fics by Americans or Canadians where the original material is British and coming across 'mom' or 'elavator' or 'jelly' instead of jam... it does kind of break the flow a bit. Which is why I generally try to make an effort. But alas, occasionally I do slip up so I'm grateful when somebody points out a mistake to me (hopefully I'll learn from it for the future!) And that's what feedback is for, eh?  I'd rather you point it out than let me do it over and over, cringeing every time. |
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Post by MirrorCard on May 25, 2006 2:10:19 GMT -5
I know what you mean - the obvious ones jar even for me. And reading fics by Americans or Canadians where the original material is British and coming across 'mom' or 'elavator' or 'jelly' instead of jam... it does kind of break the flow a bit. Which is why I generally try to make an effort. But alas, occasionally I do slip up so I'm grateful when somebody points out a mistake to me (hopefully I'll learn from it for the future!). Mum got on the lift when she realized she forgot the jam ;D Supposedly, the way people recognize how others talk is set in the brain. If that stereotype is not matched (if a Southern person doesn't talk like a Southern person or if a business man talks like a surfer), the brain doesn't believe it and instead does leads you to not trust the person because the person is out of character. So, not matching a character's dialect can destroy the character - Corrine would never say "What-everrrr!" and Vaughn would never say "Knight to E7" lol j/k. Come to think of it, I don't think I'd trust HailStorm if she didn't occasionally say certain phrases  |
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Post by ShIvErS! on Jun 27, 2006 14:19:49 GMT -5
Very funny and canon. I can completely see why this could be the real story. Paranoic Lucas was probably the funniest character you've wrote so far. Indeed, a very good story.
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. Yay for fooseball!
I'd rather you point it out than let me do it over and over, cringeing every time. 
